Have I told you about my Sunday night movie?
It's started innocently enough, the by product of no babysitter, V's long work hours/ travel and the absolute lack of close friends leading to me needing desperately this time to be on my own. I'm no great critic or lover of movies. In fact in all the time after Kid was born and I lived in London I went for 3 movies (that's in 3.4 years). And although I missed going for movies like we did when we didn't have a child (twice or so a month) I wasn't desperate by any means.
About a month or so into this Singapore stint I decided that I would go out on Sunday evenings. V, an entirely exemplary father was happy to have that uninterrupted time with Kid, playing and doing the bath and bed routine. So I'd set off after 6, once kid was fed and then wander the malls, window shopping and browsing the too expensive bookshops. I would buy dinner around 8.30 and head home and we would have a lovely meal together before the next hectic week began. It was a plan that worked, gave me the break and headspace I desperately needed.
By week three I had made a few acquaintances and been rebuffed by almost all the people I had been introduced to. I was bored of the window shopping and page turning and decided that instead I would go and watch a movie. In that one evening I re-discovered popcorn and a small drink making for a wonderful combination in front of the big screen. And so my Sunday night movie ritual was born.
For over a year now, each Sunday evening I leave after getting Kid's dinner organised and go to watch a movie. I tried to involve various people in this scheme but it turns out people are either uninterested or unreliable or just plain have a life. It's also probably my curmudgeonly-ness. And while I balked initially at going to do this on my own week after week, I stuck to it and within a matter of weeks I loved the calm of the ritual, the not needing anyone to do it with me. People look at me like I'm crazy for going on my own but hey people think I'm crazy anyway. On occasion people offer to join in and that's fine but I find I like the Sundays on my own best of all. I love that at 38 I've discovered I am really and truly my own best company. Curmudgeonly and all.
Cinemas are plentiful, clean, have fantastic audio and video, cost about $10 for a show and have an array of snacks (very important). There is a plethora of movies on all the time (thank you Hollywood and Bollywood) and I am not picky. I'm watching for the art of big screen productions and the experience rather than deep and meaningful stories and that is the key to my success. Not having to think too much about it. As a result I have seen some brilliant and unexpected movies and some really terrible productions.
Sunday is my day. It's the day we go out for lunch as a family (sometimes 3 of us, sometimes all 6) and buy in dinner for the two of us. It's the day I get to be silent from answering all the 'why mama' questions, from deciding what puzzles arts and crafts and games we will play after school, from cooking up something for dinner. It's the day I don't eat in front of the TV and watch a re-run of a re-run while V slogs away at work or on a call from home. Instead it's the day I choose what new restaurant on this small island will be worth trying. It's the day I worry about whether Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Shwarznegger will be friends again. Or if Ryan Gosling could get any handsomer. It's the day I decide if I want to replace my popcorn with an ice cream. Or if I want dumplings for dinner even though I had them for lunch.
It's my much needed day. And although a lot is due to change in the working of our household over the next few weeks I am determined to hold on to these Sundays. I really am my own best company. Curmudgeonly and all.
I'm off for The Wolf of Wall Street. Good night.
I used to go to the movies by myself all the time when I was in S'pore. It started out as enjoying the novel experience of not being physically mauled or harassed (no matter how crowded the mall) but quite quickly I found that I much preferred to be by myself. I'm not a sociable animal.ReplyDelete
I love your blog and return to it time and again. Sorry for not commenting as much as I would have liked. What a lovely post! I used to love watching movies on my own but haven't done it in a long time. This post reminded me how much I used to love my own company and that I need to find the time to be by/with myself more.ReplyDelete
Nice post. I end up at a loss on Friday evenings mostly and I quite like this idea you have tried out.ReplyDelete
Shyam, neither am I. I love my own company and this evening of mine gives me all the peace I need to tackle the week. The joy of going safely to a movie and coming home with no one hassling you, no matter how late, is wonderful!ReplyDelete
Anon: thanks for that, heartening to know I'm not the only one reading my own blog! Ones own company can be roundly relied upon to fall in line with whatever one decides ! Highly recommend it.
Anita: Do blog about your Friday evenings...always keen to know what other people do.....
Hi 30in2005, I have been a lurker on your blog for many years now, never commented, and today am de-lurking to tell you that your page has given me a number of hours of reading pleasure. Keep writing - your independence of spirit is inspiring.ReplyDelete