Friday, January 18, 2013

The Life puzzle

Our one time nanny and her partner moved from Australia four odd years ago to experience the London life. I met them for dinner recently while they were here on vacation and learnt that they have recently made plans to go and live in America for a few years. It made me think about how differently we each think/ experience life from each other. Some people thrive on the experience of seeking new things ever so often while others seek their 'home' - and build houses, careers, families and friends around that one place for as long as they possibly can.

Neither of these things are a pro or a con. They are merely expressions of personality and level of risk aversion and making the best life wherever we can. Some say people who perpetually move or think about it all the time are usually dissatisfied with their lives and therefore looking for something that does not exist. The other argument is that people who carve out their lives in one place are completely content and find other ways to make their lives interesting. Turning that on its head - some people are too risk averse to try new things while some people thrive on their adventures and lead incredibly interesting lives living and experiencing new things often.

Disclaimer: sometimes people have no choice. This is not about them. This is about people in a similar situation as us - working families with the choice or the possibility of a choice.

In our family I am the one more likely to want/ seek something/where new whereas V is more the guy willing to take the risk but only a well calculated and thought out one. Basically I was thinking about Singapore 3 years ago and it's only after 2 of those years that V turned to the same page. Luckily we seem to both be adventure seekers (or maybe we had just never found any one place we can imagine living in forever?).

Much like the beginning of our lives together in London, this move has been an adventure. An exploration of food, family, people and a culture new to us. Every minute of the last 3.5 months has been as expected 'interesting'. I use that word with caution as for me it usually signifies 'I don't like it but I don't want to be impolite'. In this case that is not true. There are things I do not like (and I'll get to those soon enough) but in the main this has been a fairly successful move. And every new thing has been interesting.

I'm hoping to gather my own thoughts about the city and specifically our move over the next few days. And then blurting them out right here, to you my lovely, entirely silent, long suffering audience.

In the meanwhile I ask you this: which one are you - the experience seeker or the ever content 'I have found my spot in the world' person???


  1. Sorry about the silence! I am enjoying your Singapore chronicles; I really am!


  2. Why have you stopped blogging? And what type of person are you (in this context I mean!)?

  3. Hmmm... me, I'm a "found my spot in the world" person who likes seeking out new experiences :) Or tries, at any rate!

  4. Defo "find my spot in life" type. 18 years in Calcutta and rest of life in London. Central London, preferably. So dull!

  5. Not by choice, I assure you - but I am the "find my spit (or was that spot) in life" person. London it is for me, though would always welcome the option of spending a year or two somewhere in Europe via job transfer.

  6. I'm definitely an experience seeker, though having set up camp here for 10 years now would instantly contradict that. I'm itching to go to some place new..

    In a sense Singapore has been my spot since the time I moved here but I'm beginning to doubt that now.

    Eagerly waiting to read about the things you did not like!

  7. Anonymous3:31 PM

    Adventure seeker all the way, moi:)
    Have lived in 6 major cities of the world since I was 17. That is apart from the place I grew up in. Some moves were due to career changes, some because I wanted to be there. This I think will be our final stop( the Bay Area)

  8. Oh, I don't know why I've stopped blogging. But about your question, I am an "itchy feet" person. Seven years on this island, and I need to work on the significant other to make him think of a new adventure.

  9. I was always a 'found my spot, leave me alone' type of person. But I suddenly feel this need to get up and move. Unfortunately the OA is not at that spot anymore - and to think he was the adventure seeker until I knocked it out of him.

    Oh well. I don't know when we'll be on the same page as far as this is concerned. I think its a question of where you are in life.

    When the babies were young and I was battling with early motherhood battles, I needed something stable in my life. Now they're older and fabulously accommodating and I feel confident that we can deal with all sorts of change.