Tuesday, December 12, 2006

ssNot niCe

I have not been to the gym since Friday (no no don’t groan or despair just yet) and as something of an addict now (ohmigod I have put on 100 kilos just smelling this dinner!) I keep bugging poor V with insane questions (do I look fat TODAY honey?). Poor chap. This is the price to pay when you marry someone who only wants homemade tomato soup made only in her own mother home, by her mother's fair hand. 3500 kms away. NOW.

I’ve been in bed since Saturday, moaning mainly, as a sniffly cold and fever have taken over the reigns. After 3 hideous days in which I alone have kept Kleenex in business, I am back at my desk - exhausted and sore nosed, but back nonetheless.

Falling ill is a rare occurance and I seem to give it my best shot when it come gets me. I felt my brains shift around in the cavernous skull with every loud sneeze. I lost my appetite and any sense of taste accompanied it on its way out – I could not tell a chicken goujon from a kebab if they both appeared under my blocked nostrils on a heated platter. I, the queen of 10 hour-a-day TV viewing, couldn't be bothered to watch anything through my bleary teary eyes. I worshipped the god of 13.5 tog duvets, drank copious amounts of hot lemon and honey water and turned our shower room into my very own personal steam room. None of it helped. I completely lost my mojo. In short I feel like hell. Even though I married Saint Patience (That dinner had NO calories in it. You ALWAYS look thin. Here's another Kleenex. Want another blanket? More soup? Ticket home to your mum?)

I bet when I get back to the gym I shall have lost more than half my body weight in pure snot. MuWaHaHAhAHa (evil laugh). Through my nose and into a Kleenex. Why didn't I think of this simple solution to weight loss before?

If I haven’t lost any I shall be very very cross.

And still very very fat.

11 comments:

  1. Get well soon! We still have the wildlife photog. of the year ex. to go and see! hugs

    ReplyDelete
  2. "I bet when I get back to the gym I shall have lost more than half my body weight in pure snot." There you go, there's positive attitude for the uninitiated :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Weight loss is the silver lining in the dark cloud that is being sick. For me, a severe throat infection was all that was needed to get my pre-pregnany pants to fit me...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh!Get well soon!!!I am sure you would have lost a few tonnes :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous8:01 AM

    Aww, get well soon. Should I come visit with some soup?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Shoefie, Yes yes. Maybe by Christmas week - if I'm still alive!

    Parth: It's positive attitude for the dumb - me!

    Rohini: The problem in this case is not my throat so I am eating fairly copious amounts of food as my throat is fine. It's the rest of me that is ill (but still hungry!).

    IA: No. It's just wishful thinking!

    Mumbaigirl: Aww. That would be nice.

    ReplyDelete
  7. awww...hope you're all better now! :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Get well soon, sweetie!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I hope you feel better soon.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Shub, Sonal and Sinusoidally: Thank you thank you. 13 days and counting - my cold has not dissipated an ounce. I am still snot central! Drugs people I need drugs!!

    Sonal: Can't get into your website. Don't have a google account and don't plan to get one. When will you change it back???

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hmm...I had no idea...lets work around it, shall we? Will let you know soon.

    ReplyDelete